i keep forgetting i know about your blog now....

I discovered the....cutest?...sweetest?...funniest?...most thoughtful?....thing the other day.

I think I've briefly mentioned before that I hadn't told My Fella about my blog.  I've kept it a secret for SO long - from most people in my day-to-day life.  The reason is: I started my blog when I was in the depths of a depression.  It was a way to start interacting with the outside world again.  A way to start reaching out; a way to start moving.  I talked (and still talk) about personal things (and not so personal things) without being conscious of my audience, and without filtering myself.  This is just a random little blog, with not many followers and no "theme" to it, but it's mine.  It's my thoughts, and it's personal, so I don't tell many people.  And I was a little shy about telling The Fella about it, for whatever reason.

But now that we live together, I figured it was time to tell him about this.  Just so I could feel I wasn't actively hiding it/something from him.  So I did.  And I felt kind of shy when I did so.

And you know what his response was??

"I know."

Excuse me?

Apparently, when we first started dating I'd sent him a picture of something.  He'd wanted something similar (I'm not sure of the details of all this) so he'd google imaged it.  Did you know you can do this?  You can search for something by image.  Anyway, that's what he did, and one of the top things that came up was my blog!

He said he's been following it ever since, and he's read all of my posts.  It's been a year and he never told me he knew about it - he figured that I'd tell him if I wanted him to know, and he didn't want me to know he knew if I didn't want him to know.  But he also logs on and reads my posts - in secret - because now that he knows, he can't not.

I at once felt kind of sad that I'd hidden it from him, and that he'd known something was being hidden.  And at the same time I felt incredible love and appreciation that this man loves me so much that he wanted to follow my blog, even if he wasn't supposed to know about it, so he did it in secret.

However, I suspect a bunch of people are going to find out about this blog now, thanks to google+ and blogger.  Did you know that any photo you post up on blogger shows up on google+, whether you want it to or not?!  Arg.

Also, little side story: it was funny the other day when I said I wanted to photograph something for my blog, and he stopped, took a second, shook his head and said "I keep forgetting I know about your blog now.".  Cute.